20 Jokes That Prove A Grandmother’s Love Never Grows Old

Welcome back to Comics Hut. Bodies change. Hands slow, hair silvers, and stairs become a negotiation. The one thing that does not age, in any grandmother anywhere, is the capacity to love the people who belong to her.

What Time Cannot Touch

People assume that emotions fade with age, that an older woman feels things less sharply. Anyone who has sat with a grandmother while she talks about her family knows this is entirely wrong. If anything, it sharpens.

These twenty jokes are gentle ones. They are funny, but each carries something true about a love that simply refuses to get older.

#1.

My hands shake now. They still know exactly how to hold a baby.

#2.

I forget where I put my glasses. I have never once forgotten a grandchild’s birthday.

#3.

I cannot hear half of what is said at that table. I would not miss a single lunch.

#4.

People say I spoil them. I have limited time and unlimited affection. The arithmetic is simple.

#5.

My memory is going. The good days are stored somewhere it cannot reach.

#6.

I keep every drawing. The fridge ran out of space in 2004 and the drawer took over.

#7.

They ring less than they used to. They are living the lives I hoped they would have.

#8.

I still set the table for more people than are coming. Old habits are loyal.

That is the quiet truth beneath all of these. An older woman is not finished with feeling. She has simply stopped performing it, which makes what remains far more direct and much harder to miss.

#9.

My knees will not let me kneel. I still get down there when a child needs me at eye level.

#10.

I have outlived most of my friends. I have not outlived my reasons to get up.

#11.

They think I do not notice when something is wrong. I have known them since the first day.

#12.

I keep the photographs by the chair so they are the first thing I see.

#13.

The house is quiet now. It was very loud once and I would take the noise back tomorrow.

#14.

I tell the same stories so they will still know them when I am not here to tell them.

#15.

My love has not aged a day. Only the body carrying it around has.

#16.

They grew up and moved away, exactly as I raised them to. It worked, and it aches.

#17.

I do not need presents. I need everyone in one room and their telephones face down.

#18.

Growing old did not make me feel less. It made me hide it less.

#19.

A grandmother’s heart does not shrink with age. It simply learns to hold more.

#20.

When you are older you will understand — and by then, I hope, you will have someone to say it to.

The heart of an elderly woman never really grows old. It grows softer, wiser and fuller. If you are lucky enough to still have yours, ring her tonight — not for a reason, just to talk. More at Comics Hut.