Welcome back to Comics Hut. There is a particular alliance between a grandmother and a grandchild that parents are never quite part of. It involves sweets before dinner, secrets kept cheerfully, and rules that mysteriously do not apply.
The Alliance Nobody Else Is Invited To
A grandmother has already raised her children. She did the discipline, the homework, the worrying. Grandchildren arrive after all of that is finished, which means she can simply enjoy them — and she fully intends to.
These twenty jokes celebrate that conspiracy: the one where grandmother and grandchild are quietly, permanently on the same side.
#1.

The rules at my house are different. I made them, and I may change them without notice.
#2.

My daughter says no sweets before dinner. My daughter is not here, and I am.
#3.

A grandmother’s job is to spoil them thoroughly and hand them back energetic.
#4.

My grandson asked if I would tell his mother. I asked what there was to tell.
#5.

Grandchildren are the reward for not strangling your own children in their teenage years.
#6.

She asked for one biscuit. She received four. We have agreed not to discuss the arithmetic.
#7.

My grandson thinks I am the fun one. I have decided not to correct this impression.
#8.

Bedtime at my house is a suggestion, gently made and rarely enforced.
Underneath the sweets and the broken rules is something genuinely important. A grandmother offers a kind of attention that busy parents often cannot — unhurried, uncritical, and entirely on the child’s terms.
#9.

They arrive well behaved and leave full of sugar. This is the service I provide.
#10.

My granddaughter told me a secret. It is safe. I have already forgotten most of it.
#11.

I am not spoiling them. I am investing in being visited when I am much older.
#12.

My grandson said I am his favourite. I paid nothing for this and treasure it entirely.
#13.

Their parents made rules. I was not consulted, so I do not consider myself bound.
#14.

She asked for a story. I told her one that was true. She thinks I made it up.
#15.

My grandchildren think I have always been old. I have photographs that would shock them.
#16.

When they visit, the good biscuits appear. When they leave, the tin returns to buttons.
#17.

I let them win. They have not worked this out yet and I am in no hurry.
#18.

They ask what it was like without phones. Quieter, I say. They find this suspicious.
#19.

A grandmother listens to the same story four times and laughs properly every single time.
#20.

They will not remember what I bought them. They will remember that I always had time.
If you had a grandmother like this, you were given something rather valuable. If you are one, the grandchildren will remember far more than you think. More stories at Comics Hut.
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